crazy

I had a new thought today, and I have to keep blaming things on my pregnancy hormones, but sometimes things can't be so easily shrugged.

Maybe we should just concentrate on Craig going to CRNA school?  Maybe if he's doing that, and he becomes a big fancy CRNA, I could stay at home with my kids for a while and do what is right for them, and for me, for a short while?

Is that SUCH a crazy thought?  I mean, I know I want to be a midwife, but it will mean more care for Connor by other people, other people I don't trust and that don't have my child's best interests in mind.  I'm dwelling.

So the truth is, I have this ONE simple task to do at work today before Ravneet gets here, and I keep procrastinating because I really really really can't get Connor out of my head.